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Behold These Three New Banners for Twilight: New Moon

by Ethan Anderton
September 29, 2009
Source: Yahoo

If you've been near any teenage girls lately, then you've undoubtedly heard all the shrill screaming that has become associated with Robert Pattinson and the melodramatic vampire tales from Stephanie Meyer's The Twilight Saga. Clearly it doesn't matter if the books read like they were written by a middle school English student, or that vampire's glittering in sunlight doesn't really call for complete seclusion from the sun's rays, because Twilight is the hot gossip. And in case you were concerned about just how the lines were going to be divided amongst characters in the upcoming New Moon, these banners from Yahoo clear things up for us.

Here's our two leads, estranged lovers Bella Swan and Edward Cullen, their love torn apart to the tunes of an emo soundtrack. Behind them, the Cullen family looking bloodthirsty, but dressed in the latest GAP fashions. Don't the uses of the (RED) campaign and the Cullen's thirst for blood write themselves?

New Moon - Vampires

Here Taylor Lautner leads the Wolf Pack who clearly sent around an e-mail to all wear brown shirts on school photo day. Not only that but they all have matching tattoos, too! Seriously guys, just call yourselves the Jets and we'll all have a lot more fun when this damn movie comes out.

New Moon - Wolf Pack

Finally, here's the vampire coven known as the Volturi, who apparently took style tips from My Chemical Romance. Dakota Fanning and Michael Sheen are newcomers to Twilight and yet they weren't even given the respect of a proper Photoshop tweak to remove red eye. As Stephanie Tanner would say, "How rude!"

New Moon - Volturi

The newest trailer for New Moon debuted two weeks ago. We didn't feature it, you can find it on Apple.

The Twilight Saga: New Moon is directed by Chris Weitz, of only Down to Earth, About a Boy, and The Golden Compass previously. The screenplay was written by Melissa Rosenberg, of TV shows like "Dexter" and "The O.C." as well as Step Up and Twilight previously. This is based on the second book in Stephenie Meyer's incredibly popular series of novels about vampire Edward Cullen and his love Bella Swan. Summit Entertainment will be bringing The Twilight Saga: New Moon to theaters starting on November 20th.

Explore tags: Opinions, Posters

Joseph S.

Damn Alex, I'm getting the feeling you don't like New Moon.. LOL. Just kidding. But these banners make me laugh. You pretty much nailed it when you said all those things about these banners. Exactly what i was thinking. LOL
Colin

Looks shit. Teenager Vampires who rip there shirts off every chance they get just to impress the ladys who go to the Cinema, its more about sex appeal than a story. if i want to watch a film like this ( except better ) i'll just go watch Underworld.
agentX

@2 Totally Agree
jen

if you actually know what the story is about, you would know thats not really the reason for all the nakedness. i mean yeah its a plus, but there is a good reason for everything. maybe you should just see the movie or read the book before you judge.
Colin

Thats good if you know what the story is about but you have to admit that 70/80% of people who go to see this is going for the men or should i say boys. I just get anoid when a movie like this gets all hyped but a movie like Underworld gets crapped on by people ( even tho there something the same except Underworld is darker ) it even has Michael Sheen who was in underworld. I think its because girls would tend not to go and see Underworld because off Kate Beckinsale Im not saying Twilight is just 4 girls but there is more who watch it than boys.
http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/2408/blackbabyjesus.gif Crapola

C'mon Jen, 'reading books' is for idiots, who needs to read when you can watch tv or go to the cinema? When doing the 'reading' you actually have to use your imagination. It actually looks a lot better than the first one, don't really know why the trailer wasn't featured on this site, it's no wetter than Transformers.
underworldfan

Why is Lucian there? LOL
Vincent Cipollone

I find it amusing that a girl is defending how bad and fail this movie / novel franchise is, and only appeals to 14 yr old girls. why not just retitle the movie nsync 2.0
Zehgut

S*#t Sandwich
Kendoll

These banners make my stomach hurt.
hml

Fuck you Alex!
TNo

Looks like a bad B-movie or something on the CW. And what's with the ethnic divide between vampires and werewolves?
Tra la la la la di da

Thinking the samething #11. Does CW have a new series coming out? I guess they hav to replace Supernatural with something which by the way is one of the greatest shows to come out since 2000. These are such trash and so are the books so give it up #4 and stop trying to convert people to dumb themselves.
Frank Booth

Looks great. Will be a great movie for men and woman of ALL ages.
Lazarus from Sparta!!!!

Can't....stop....looking...banners....so....horrible....But....dude....from....Underworld.....such a....great...actor....He....was....in....The Four Feathers too.....Vampires....so....sparkly......The horror....the horror........
Antioch

Actually liked the first one for what it was. I can't stand Dakota Fanning but Michael Sheen is always good. Give it a chance. I do really wish Fanning was MIA for this one though. She may ruin it if she's in the movie too much.
wow

HAHAHAHA. This movie looks fucking gay. Reminds me of the South Park episode where the Goth kids were fighting with the Vampires. Lmao!!! Wow.... wtf are ppl watching.
sumonesumtime

@ 15 Twilight was a total waste of time that was so bad I could almost smell it. You obviously know nothing about film. Secondly Dakota Fanning is a genius. One of the best child actors of all time and I think soon to become one of the best period.
?????

ugh...
nate

Oh my gay...
SuicidalOptimist

Everyone who defends these movies with "Well, if you knew the books..." and "Maybe you should read the books before blah, blah, blah..." needs to get their heads out their asses, or more likely their vaginas, and realize that movies (yes, even the ones based on books) are suppose to stand alone. I read a lot, and I agree that most of the time the books are a lot better than the movies. But if I HAVE to read a book in order to understand the movie that is based on it, something is wrong. Maybe the Twilight books are "leik, totally amazing, guise!" The adaptation of it makes me not wanna give the books a chance at all. The movies just look incredibly cheesy, and the dialogue makes me wanna drown puppies. Not to mention Bella's facial expressions. She looks like a helmet kid most of the time. And isn't Edward suppose to be of godly beauty in the books? Then why did they cast someone who looks like he got repeatedly hit in the face with a shovel? Whatever. Some of you will wet their panties of this shit, others will either not watch it at all or watch it friends just to make fun of it. To each their own.
Pete

Hahaha totally agree #21. The only difference is that I finally broke down and saw Twilight. Oops.
Lazarus from Sparta!!!!

@18...this is 15....Correct me but i think your comment was for #16 I took no offence so no worries...Now where was I...oh yes...Vampires....so...shinny in daylight....so sparkly....and metrosexual....such...a...curse....is....so....heavy....on.....the....soul....the horror.....the....horror!!!
Erika

Excuse me while I LOL uncontrollably...
DoomCanoe

piss on this and burn it
markers

Yo, Alex! Why don't you act this way when real crap like Transformers 2 come out? It would make for a more interesting post.
janet

an improvement compared to the posters for twilight....at least imo.
Sabes

I can't see why any other girl would find the men on these posters attractive. Bleh. You have Robert Pattinson's smashed look (His arms are really hairy O.o ), and Taylor Lautner's imploding face. The guy in the back of the third poster looks like he's in pain or confused. Poor guy, maybe it's both.
Tra la la la la di da

Girls love gay guys. It's their thing...not sure why but explains a lot about this.
Lakan

there eyes are supposed to be RED...dumbass!
Tra la la la la di da

ROFLMAO!!! Lakan...wow, you are an idiot. It's sarcasm dumbass. That's good stuff. Nothing like seeing people act smart and then go "doh!" Sorry, odd mood tonight.
me

um...arent the wolves supposed to be native americans? they look like menudo
SS

Well these things do have their audience.. you know.... One man's trash is another girl's gold.
Madnezz344

What Lucian? lmao excuse me when I say this movie is gona suck but ITS GONA SUCK BIG TIME!
fzero

Edward's head is HUGE! way to go.
SlashBeast

These POS books and movies are singlehandedly responsible for the wimpification of vampires. Sparkling vampires? WTF? What's scary is that people actually defend this trash.
Cause It's the In thing to do

HAHAHA Edward looks like Fagenstein.......I mean Frankenstein just needs the bolts on his neck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bring on the new Trends!!!!!!!!!!
nacho supreme

why do the werewolves look like gay prostitutes? WTF! but i have such a hard on for dakota. bring on the runaways movie!