Hamlet to Be the First of Six 3D Shakespeare Adaptations
by Brandon Lee Tenney
August 13, 2009
And if that headline doesn't have you excited, then you just wait. The laughably named UK theatre company Shakespeare 4 Kidz (which I can only assume is in cahoots with Kidz Bop over here in the States) is moving forward with a six-picture deal to market Shakespeare to (what they say is) the Harry Potter and High School Musical market, according to Variety. I'd say the latter market is correct, but I'd replace Harry Potter with the Twilight crowd. But that's just me. Hamlet: The 3-D Musical is up first to be followed by Macbeth, Romeo and Juliet, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Twelfth Night, and The Tempest. Still on board?
You're still reading? I'll bet I could write just about anything right now. Good thing this story's comedy just writes itself. The producers of this monstrosity - I mean, this ridiculous attempt to culture kids - I mean, this series of films, say that "Hamlet lends itself to a 3-D treatment." Oh boy. "The producers hope to include a ghost that hovers in front of the audience's eyes, cannon fire that flies into the auditorium and a sword fight that appears to happen all around [the] viewers." And I'm sure Shakespeare's exploration of the impossibility of certainty and revenge and death and incestuous desire will all be in there, too (I hope).
I also have heard that it was Shakespeare's original intention that Hamlet be a 3-D musical for kids, but, you know - then he realized that he'd much rather impact the whole of English language, literature, and culture instead. Shakespeare 4 Kidz - with the utmost respect, may a plague befall your house swiftly and with ire.