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Don't Watch: First Teaser Trailer for Farrelly Bros' New 'Three Stooges'

by Alex Billington
December 7, 2011
Source: Apple

"Did you get a haircut?" Well, here they are, your new Three Stooges of 2012 - Will Sasso, Sean Hayes and Chris Diamantopoulos as Curly, Larry and Moe. 20th Century Fox has unveiled the first official teaser trailer via Apple for the Farrelly Brothers' comedy event of 2012, The Three Stooges, a revival of the classic comedy trio from the 20s, somehow redone in 2012 without being funny at all. There's all the typical gags, jokes, slaps and everything, even Nuns in bikinis, as you'd only expect from the Farrellys. This looks about as unfunny, uninspired and unexciting as one could imagine. Risk watching it only if you wish.

Watch the first teaser trailer for the Farrelly Brothers' The Three Stooges, in high def via Apple:

The Three Stooges is written & directed by filmmaking brothers Bobby & Peter Farrelly, of the comedies including Dumb & Dumber, Kingpin, There's Something About Mary, Shallow Hal, The Heartbreak Kid and Hall Pass. Inspired by the original "Three Stooges" shorts from the 1930s, the storyline will follow the trio from when they're orphans and into adulthood. The film will be divided into three half-hour shorts, and the Stooges will get mixed up in plots involving murder and a reality show. In addition to Diamantopoulos, Hayes and Sasso, the supporting cast includes Jane Lynch, Larry David, Sofía Vergara, Jennifer Hudson and Stephen Collins. Fox is bringing the new Three Stooges to theaters everywhere April 4th, 2012. Anyone?

Filed under Opinions, To Watch, Trailers

From around the web:

Xerxexx

Wow...that...was...um...interesting. Family fun perhaps...but serious comedy? (wait...serious comedy?) no way.
- Anonymous
  
  It was crap. To be fair I never thought the Stooges were funny. It was lame, the nun in the pool is insanely hot, and I only laughed when Snookie took one in the eye.
  - Shitballs
    
    Yeah, i'll shit down your ass crack, GRANDPA! I'm gonna jack off all over you...
Thexn

Why did I watch that? Now anytime I watch classic Stooges I'm going to have that creeping around in the back of my mind! Crud.
Marty

Ok, yes, this looks bad. BUT in it's defense, the actors themselves seem to pull off a great Three Stooges, it's just that the filmmakers must of thought it would be funny to take 3 characters from many decades ago and put them in modern day. If this was a period film, alla "Oh Brother" I think I'd actually dig the humor.
- Jericho
  
  plus he poked Snookie in the eyes...that's all i need to see to get me to watch this....
  - Shitballs
    
    OH I KNOW MAN! My favorite part was when he was like "You fucking crinkled dick nose comb!" and then totally Larrys a Curly in the guys Moe. (if you did't know, that's a sex move called the 3 stooges which the original name came from. If I have to tell you what a Larry, Curly and Moe are... then you are never going to be able to please a woman). I'm gonna fight you so fucking hard.
Nealio

No one will see this film fewer times than me.
http://twitter.com/sputnikreviews Nicholas Robinson

Idk y but I chuckled quite a bit in that trailer
JJ King

I really expected not laugh, laughed 3 times!
- JJ King
  
  not to laugh
  - http://twitter.com/AgentKidSociety Agent Kid Society
    
    Please....stop.
http://twitter.com/sputnikreviews Nicholas Robinson

@Marty I agree
Chazzy

Holy crap. This is a disgrace.
http://twitter.com/sideshowRaheem sideshowRaheem

Well everyone told them it was a mistake, and looks like they should have listened. Even The Three Stooges knew their schtick only worked in 15 minute chunks so how these guys expected to make it work for at lest 90 minutes is beyond me.
- Shitballs
  
  It was a mistake for your mom not to swallow... nah, i'm playing, he's a good guy. But seriously, if you wanna fight, I will fucking internet fight you until internet explorer 10 comes out. Just PM me bro.
Sands

Sofia Vergara is so voluptuous and sexy. She's a very talented actress. She'll be wonderful in the film.
- http://twitter.com/AgentKidSociety Agent Kid Society
  
  ....yeeeeahh.
  - Shitballs
    
    Gross dudes, get a room.
Manuel

No way.
http://www.facebook.com/javier.gloria Jav G Gloria

FAAIL! and sorry for the caps
Curly Joe

I think that if the Farrelly brothers dug up the remains of Moe, Larry and Curly and then raped their corpses for about an hour and a half while filming it, it would not be half as offensive or a complete slap in the face to the geniuses that The Three Stooges were. Let us hope that they can forgive us for letting this horrendous film see the light of day.
- Spike-the-poet
  
  George Lucas raped 6 corpses before he was done w/Starwars...
Al

I laughed almost the whole time on how BAAAADDDDD it is going to be. Will I see it? Absolutely. Just to watch a really bad bad bad movie. So excited. (This is the kinda movie where you get so drunk so that you pretend its really good)
- http://www.facebook.com/gockel Phillip Gockel
  
  I'll buy that. Fantastic drunk movie.
- Anonymous
  
  I am drunk right now and I didn't laugh once. Graned, I['m not THAT drunk. just mildly buzzed. I don't think this movie is gonna work...
- Anonymous
  
  There are 16 states where people will watch this movie. California, Colorado, Alaska, Arizona....you get the point.
http://twitter.com/BarnabyBarrilla Barnaby Barrilla

I can't believe this was made
- Shitballs
  
  You can't believe a movie was made after a popular television show? I bet you are a person who takes a lot of things for granted... That's right, I offended you on the internet asshole. I hate your guts, and personally, I think you are kind of weird. Oh, I also want to fight you. I'm gonna lay one right in the kisser!
junglejim

Honestly, I'm not sure what everyone is complaining about It seemed like every other Three Stooges bit I've ever seen. Slapstick to the core. Not awesome comedy, slapstick. What did everyone expect?
- http://twitter.com/AgentKidSociety Agent Kid Society
  
  "Not awesome comedy, slapstick." So are you saying what the original 3 stooges did wasn't "awesome" at the time? Slapstick or not, what they did for comedy as a whole is fucking legendary...
  - junglejim
    
    true, but it isn't the three stooges' time anymore, so how did anyone expect this to be amazing? its just about as good as i expected.
  - Shitballs
    
    I hate your opinion. Get off the internet, queer.
    - http://twitter.com/AgentKidSociety Agent Kid Society
      
      Digging up 3 month old posts.... Get out your mother's basement already!
      - Shitballs
        
        You got two options, break me off some bread and I won't crunch your spine between my ass, or, refuse and I will steal that bread and make a knuckle sandwich, ya dig? And I live upstairs, not the basement. My mom won't let me stay down there cause of spiders.
Forgottenromeo

Berate it all you want... I thought it looked pretty much spot on... How else did you THINK a three stooges film set in this day and age was going to look? I'll be going to see it, for sure.
truong18

I like the nun
nick

This is a joke, right?
Anonymous

That would make an absolutely fantastic SNL skit. Movie? Not so much.
- Shitballs
  
  Keep your horrible fucking thoughts to yourself. Nothing on SNL since the mid 90's will ever be "absolutely fantastic" I would also like to challenge you to a fight. But as of right now I have fights pending from other users here, so just wait your fucking turn. Don't be an eager beaver. (how's that for an SNL skit? Be like Leave It to Beaver but he is eager to do shit... like his homework and stuff).
  - Pendy16
    
    Awwww cool it internet tough guy, get your panties out of a bunch and have mommy make yer breakfast.
    - Shitballs
      
      My first contender! WELCOME TO THE THUNDER DOME!! AHH YEAH!!! And my mommy didn't make me breakfast. She said I had to make since I didn't have school. I COME FROM A HARD LIFE BRO! WHERE SATURDAYS ARE UNFULFILLED WITH BREAKFAST FROM THE LOVE OF MY OWN MOTHER! THAT'S HOOD! Now stay right here because I heard a new Supah Ninjas is on Nickelodeon...
magnus

You can tell that the bikini is actually digitally altered. Probably to cover more in the trailer.
- Shitballs
  
  Get a life dude, people are trying to start fights... unless that's what you came for, then hit me up!
Horgin

I sort of wish I had heeded Alex's suggestion. I agree with Marty though, it would work much better as a period piece.
grimjob

OK. Hmmm. The schtick is funny. I found myself laughing when they pulled off the Stooge moves. the bit at the end with the present to that dumb bitch from that stupid show made me laugh pretty hard. But it all just reminds me of how great the Stooges were, and I don't think I'll be able to sit through an entire film of these guys.
Franklin_Carpio

Am I the only one that sees this as exactly what I remember from the original? The Three Stooges were always about slap stick comedy? And I think they portrayed them perfectly... I don't expect this to be a smart amazing movie... but I do see it as a hilarious Three Stooges movie.
grimjob

And dear god, who is sister Bernice?
- Sew
  
  Kate Upton
  - Shitballs
    
    He didn't ask you, he asked God, dipshit. Just for that I am fighting your first. SEWW EEEE HERE PIG PIG PIG SEWW EEEE!! Gotta knuckle sandwich laid on the counter for ya buddy, all ya gotta do is bite!
junk

It's been said above already, but I figure it's worth reiterating - say what you will about whether this will be a good flick, but I am fairly convinced as far as the stooge portrayals go. The impressions are spot on. I do wish sort of, that maybe the Farrelly Brothers had done the whole thing in black and white, and kept it timeless rather than updating it to the present. The schtick might have worked a little better.
Jon

i think its Kate Upton
http://twitter.com/AgentKidSociety Agent Kid Society

Please, excuse my language when I say... THAT was f*****g horrible!
Anonymous

IT HURTS SOOOO MUUUUCH!!!!
http://the72pins.com DaftBot

Anyone else think this movie looks like it was made in the 90s?
LV 426

For all the sheer stupidity of that trailer it did make me chuckle a few times. I aint expecting brilliance but then what do ya expect its the stooges ) i will defo watch this, perfect for sunday viewing when on a come-down ;o)
Joe

That was utterly awful.
- Shitballs
  
  Nice review, Joe. You are very insightful. You seem to be that of the highest intellect. And for that, I will not fight you... once you're dead.
  - Shitballs
    
    That may look bad like I am going to kill you. I am not. I would never threaten someones life. I am just... kind of giving you the option to end it yourself, or fight be real fucking hard like a man, here on the internet. WWW FIGHT CHAMP JABRONI!!! TRY AND TAKE THE TITLE!!!! OH? WHAT'S THAT? YOU DO SMELL WHAT I AM COOKING!! Well let that be a warning then... and stop smelling things, queer.
  - Thesocialowner
    
    You are the worst troll ever lol... You can't illicit a reponse from anyone. Despite your best efforts you even fail at flaming. Btw this movie will suck... On a gloriously massive scale. Don't encourage it
    - Shitballs
      
      Sorry it took so long to reply. Mrs. Watson gave a friggin D in history. Pssh! SO MY MOM GROUNDED ME FROM THE INTERNET! Was supposed to be all summer but I did some chores. Anywho, I am back and ready to fight you all over the world. The reason I can't get a response is because they are afraid. I'm owning this board. Nothing but pussy cats on here.
Judasbarronx1

Well... it wasn't THAT bad. About what was expected.
Popcorn

It was ok for what it is till SNOOKIE popped up.............Anything attched to her will FAIL!
D.

Have you guys ever watched the show? Seems ok to me, this is exactly the comedy from past. I know everyone here are a bunch of kids, but i expected more from you Alex.
http://twitter.com/Nielsen700 M.K. Nielsen

He shoud've killed Snookie at the end. Then maybe I'd laugh.
- Salber on Cinema
  
  you're one of those people that sit through the SAW movies arent you.
http://www.skonmovies.com/ Sean Kelly

...
97point6

Never was a fan, then and now. Why the male nun in the first shot?
Jack

Wasn't funny then. Isn't funny now.
- Salber on Cinema
  
  yeah, that's why they're comedy icons
Tonker

can you un-see something ...?
- Shitballs
  
  Yeah, I could. By punching your fucking lights out. Man I am getting real sick of the people on here. I have been cruising up and down this page, making comments, misspelling words, using bad grammar, for about 10 minutes now and not a one of you want to fight me. We'll see about this...
l.21

CAn't be any worse than any any other comedies coming out lately.
Lando

sorry guys. I grew up watching this and I still watch it on amc weekends and its funny as hell. I dont expect much from a remake, I mean, these guys were funny with their gags and characters, you cant stray too far from that..but its tough to imitate it. I'll watch it for free but I wont care if it sucks. the originals are still available (for a reason) to this day.. oh and yea, he poked snookie in the eyes. good enough for me
- Salber on Cinema
  
  they should have poked the WHOLE CASTof Jersey Shore in the eye.
Anonymous

Everything was going smoothly up until Snookie showed her annoying fucking face! Jersey Shore!? Seriously!? WHY!? *sigh* other than that the Stooges portrayals are actually quite spot on, Sasso seems to be the only reason for me wanting to see this movie. :/
WillMars

Ummm.....Why is Larry David a nun....
- Salber on Cinema
  
  why not.
- Shitballs
  
  Because he has two first names, idiot. I'm skipping fighting you. You're obviously a fat turd. Never, ever, make me have to comment to you. It's a waste of my time.
Johnnyc

Why was this movie made its a joke. The Cast is horrible and the story and dialogue is idiotic and not in a funny way. Also why the need to be anti-Catholic I mean they cast a known anti-christian larry david as a nun and then a homosexual Jane Lynch as one Then off course poke fun at Nuns and Christians. And why did they put jersey shore cast in it? It seems the whole movie is more of a propaganda machine and a bad pop culture joke then a salute to the stooges! I feel sorry for the people who get tricked into watching it.
http://twitter.com/DoctorSubmarine Josh Rosenfield

Wow. The guys playing the Stooges themselves are doing an awesome job with their roles. With a proper script, this could be an awesome movie. It looks like the right cast for the job.
http://twitter.com/PyroDark Kevin M Scanlan

...Why is it I never considered it would be done in modern day? I think that actually hurts it (more). God that was awful, you probably couldn't pay me to watch this.
Henry101

Highlight of that trailer: Poking Snookie in the eyes.
Anonymous

This would be better as "The Three Stooges on the Jersey Shore". Just watch them inadvertently torture the Jersey cast into madness.
bazzzass

idk with the movies they make i don't think it'll be family oriented....keeping the slapstick yea you have to its the three stooges but they probably put a little naughtiness into the mix i would'nt doubt..
Stevenfreestyler

Fatality for the stooges.....
Alleycat4444

You have to admit, Snooki being poked in the eyes is a good bit in the trailer
http://twitter.com/darktaxidermist Davide Coppola

If this gets anything higher than 0% on Rotten Tomatoes...
Anonymous

wha are you all talking about!? the only good part about this entire trailer was that Snookie and J-Wow were in it!
- Shitballs
  
  I can only imagine what kind of canals you take your "DoomCanoe" in. It's people like you who I am out to destroy. It has absolutely nothing to do with your comment. This time it's personal. It's your screen name.
the three amigo's

what a load of shit,boobs were the best bit.
Brian

I can't believe I watched it. THAT.........WAS.........TERRIBLE!!!!!!!
Blurb

00:57 - Curly Shuffle FAIL
jd

PG rating, a 70 yo could go with 10 yo grandkid and both laugh. Isnt that a good thing?
Anonymous

I don't see how you could do a movie like this differently, except not set it in modern day. It's the the characters and situations pretty much down. It's the Three Stooges. Fuck all y'all, I wanna see them deal with iPhones and SUVs. I want to see them wander around that world.
Drg9176

This looks great! I cant wait for it to come out! And for all u people that think this new stooges trailer sucks u must have boring , depressing lives and have nothing better to do
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000510309182 Lauren Intong

Makes me think of a 90s movie.
NobodyNose

The three leads actually look good physically and visually. Unfortunately, that's all this project has going for it. Any consideration about seeing this went right out the window once The Orange Goblin (Snooki) showed up. Jesus, was that the best they could do?
Armeetapus16

ok, i'm ok with the casting of the stooges now, but, I really really really hate the setting they chose for the movie, the stooges are too dated to exist in the 21st century. Had this movie taken place in the 30s or 40s, i would've been more enthused about it
Amas

I stopped asking long ago why they must rape our beloved franchises with current cultural tropes. But I laughed my a$$ off when Snooks got poked in the eye, just sayin.
Vacantfinder

a disgrace to the stooges...pathetic...really Snooki?? GTFO here with garbage
Damansanfrancisco

It's the Shemp of Three Stooges movies. Of course Shemp had more talent than these three jokers.
Tenacious V

That was worth the minute and a half just to watch Snookie take one in the face.
Vintage Movie Fan

The Three Stooges simply don't fit into modern times. It's a poor attemp at trying to do so. While the actors do their part, the setting and jokes don't fit the Three Stooges.
thepurplecow

Guys, everything now is targeted to a specific audience. If you have kids they'll love it. Mine laughed their eyes out every time I played the trailer. This movie is not targeted to YOU.
Neonblue120

This will be ok and all you bitches will be like neon told us.
mcbot

Childhood raped and murdered.
DocPiranha

Ok. I watched it twice and being a stooge fan, I have to say, I am intrigued. They seem to have the timing of the stooges down. The Farrelly bros usually do a good job of keeping us laughing, so I'm definitely going to see it. Hey... It's a way to bring the stooges to a new generation. Don't knock it until you've seen the whole thing.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1454815633 Michael Baldwin

Id rather chop my balls of then see this.....
Feldais1017

Yall are just jealous you didn't get to poke Snooki in the eyes >P
nobodyinparticular

I grew up with the stooges, and people who say things like "wasn't funny then, isn't funny now" definitely exemplify why anti-depressants are a multi-billion (or even trillion) dollar industry. I'm a little depressed just referencing that one... Those actors nailed it, and I'm impressed enough to want to watch it on dvd at least. I agree with the comment that it'll be fun to watch drunk or stoned. With some of my juvenile friends. And some girls. And a hot tub nearby for afterwards. All you haters are jealous that everyone else is funner than you...yeah funner...i said it...
Jbb

The trailer is very funny, and as a long time Stooges fan, I can't wait to see this film. It is long overdue that someone had the ba**s to attempt a modern version. Congrats to the Farrelly Brothers!!
Cvanhook

I think I am going to see it. The actors if nothing else do a pretty good job of imitating the originals. Sometimes you just need something to watch and not be taken seriously. Everyone is a movie critic I suppose.
Shitballs

I am going to fight all of you mother fuckers. Right now. Dukes up. Dick.