Hamlet to Be the First of Six 3D Shakespeare Adaptations
by Brandon Lee Tenney
August 13, 2009
And if that headline doesn't have you excited, then you just wait. The laughably named UK theatre company Shakespeare 4 Kidz (which I can only assume is in cahoots with Kidz Bop over here in the States) is moving forward with a six-picture deal to market Shakespeare to (what they say is) the Harry Potter and High School Musical market, according to Variety. I'd say the latter market is correct, but I'd replace Harry Potter with the Twilight crowd. But that's just me. Hamlet: The 3-D Musical is up first to be followed by Macbeth, Romeo and Juliet, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Twelfth Night, and The Tempest. Still on board?
You're still reading? I'll bet I could write just about anything right now. Good thing this story's comedy just writes itself. The producers of this monstrosity - I mean, this ridiculous attempt to culture kids - I mean, this series of films, say that "Hamlet lends itself to a 3-D treatment." Oh boy. "The producers hope to include a ghost that hovers in front of the audience's eyes, cannon fire that flies into the auditorium and a sword fight that appears to happen all around [the] viewers." And I'm sure Shakespeare's exploration of the impossibility of certainty and revenge and death and incestuous desire will all be in there, too (I hope).
I also have heard that it was Shakespeare's original intention that Hamlet be a 3-D musical for kids, but, you know - then he realized that he'd much rather impact the whole of English language, literature, and culture instead. Shakespeare 4 Kidz - with the utmost respect, may a plague befall your house swiftly and with ire.
Reader Feedback - 11 Comments
Sick. I'm really starting to hate this unnecessary 3D garbage. It's not revolutionary it doesn't add all that much to the experience. Frankly I find it all retarded.
KenDoll on Aug 13, 2009
3-D: Ways to make bad movies sell.
Antioch on Aug 13, 2009
Gotta agree with one and two here, Shakespeare 4 Kidz...wow.
Xerxex on Aug 13, 2009
This is me choking on my own vomit.
germs on Aug 13, 2009
Cody on Aug 13, 2009
........................ :\ ................................
Sabes on Aug 13, 2009
I'm a 3D artist and this shit makes me sick.
IK! on Aug 14, 2009
"Hamlet lends itself to a 3-D treatment." ... "The producers hope to include a ghost that hovers in front of the audience's eyes, cannon fire that flies into the auditorium and a sword fight that appears to happen all around [the] viewers." omg.wtf. Zac Effron as Hamlet...and Romeo.
Branden on Aug 14, 2009
6 will go down to 1 once they see Hamlet BOMB. Kids and Shakespeare? And Hamlet is all about murder. WTF? How does this shit get made?
CJ on Aug 14, 2009
i think this will be great i have 4 kids from 6 - 13 and they love 3d films, kids love 3d films just to see objects flying around and being involved is absolutely fabulous. just to bring shakespeare literature down to a level for kids to understand and then having them involved with 3d sounds great.
V on Aug 15, 2009
Why are you so quick to judge what you haven't seen? The stage adaptations of Shakespeare 4 Kidz' shows which tour the UK and abroad are huge hits with the audiences who see them: just check out http://www.shakespeare4kidz.com to see what pupils, parents and the press have to say about us! I think you will be surprised. Wait and see what the movies are like and judge them then.
Di Eccleston on Aug 19, 2009
Sorry, new comments are no longer allowed.